Jokes about the New Year 2025 can be used as toasts. Funny stories can be told at the festive table. A cheerful person is always the soul of the company, it is pleasant to spend time with him.
The symbol of 2025 according to the eastern calendar will be the Green Green Wooden Snake. This animal is gentle and affectionate, so 2025 promises to be one of the best.
We have prepared funny jokes for you for the New Year 2025. They will help to ease the tension and make the New Year celebration fun.
Jokes about dragons
Funny jokes about dragons will help you laugh heartily at the New Year's partyThe main thing is to tell them with expression and artistry:
A real man is not the one who fights a dragon for you, but the one who is not afraid to stay with you if you are a dragon!
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No hero had the courage to climb the tower, because a terrible and terrifying dragon sat at its top.
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But one pure-hearted guy came closer:
“Do you need help getting down?” asked the brave knight.
“That would be nice!” the dragon replied.
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There are some princesses, after saving whom you think: “Why did I kill the dragon?”
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A knight was walking through the desert. His journey was long, he was tormented by thirst and hunger. The knight had only a sword left of his weapons, he had lost everything along the way. In the distance, the knight saw a lake, he approached it and wanted to drink water quickly, but a three-headed dragon was sitting near the lake. The knight took out his sword and began to fight the three-headed creature. The battle lasted for several days, on the fourth day the dragon fell exhausted. The exhausted knight fell next to him.
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The dragon asks:
-What did you want?
“To drink some water,” answered the knight.
-I would drink it then...
Moral: Don't make your life difficult!
Jokes about New Year's Eve
Jokes about the 2025 New Year will help you spend the holiday in a great moodIt’s not for nothing that they say: “How you celebrate the New Year is how you will spend it!”
– Do you want to be covered in chocolate in the New Year?
- Want.
– Then put a bar of unwrapped chocolate under your pillow.
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– My wife and I had a great time congratulating each other on the New Year! I gave her a trip to the Maldives…
- And she?
- She flew away...
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- Let's finally finish the renovation on December 31st. Bring the tools!
- Are you crazy? The neighbors will complain.
- This is the only day when no one can hear anything because of the music and fireworks!
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On New Year's Eve, Vovochka made a wish: "I want every day to be New Year!" The wish came true: two months later, the boy retired.
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If you collect all the money that is spent on New Year's corporate parties in Russia, you can rent Spain for the New Year!
Jokes about Santa Claus
A joke about a letter to Santa Claus: “Dear Santa Claus! Please put a jar of brine under my Christmas tree.”
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“Dear Santa Claus, I am writing you my fifth letter already, my mother tore up the previous ones. She tells me not to waste my time on nonsense, but to get a job.” Dimochka (42 years old).
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Santa Claus freezes the foreign accounts of wealthy people who have behaved badly all year.
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Santa Claus! This time I am writing you a letter on sandpaper. I wonder if you can do with it what you did last year.
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In a military unit, an officer addresses his subordinates:
– Who will be Santa Claus this year?
Silence in response.
- I don’t get it, everyone wants to be Snow Maidens?
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The hall after the children's party. In a large box there are many postcards with wishes to Santa Claus: "I want a dog. Vanya is 4 years old", "I want a dollhouse. Nastya is 5 years old", "I wish you health, Santa Claus!", "I want an apartment and a car! Tanechka is 34 years old"
New Year's jokes for children
Good and kind jokes can teach children a lot:
A boy and a girl are making a snowman.
The girl says:
– Go home and get three carrots!
“One for the nose, and what are the others for?” the boy asks.
- Let's eat.
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- Mom, which train do you think is the most late?
- Don't know.
- The one you promised to give me last year.
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A little daughter helps her mother set the table before the New Year, takes a knife and cuts off a thick piece of sausage. Mom says:
- Nastenka, you can cut the sausage thinner.
- And this is for myself.
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Mom asks her son:
– In order to become better, I quit eating sweets before the New Year, dad quits smoking, and what do you want to quit?
– Maybe I should quit school?
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A mother and son are choosing a New Year tree in a store. The mother says:
- Let's choose a small Christmas tree and put it in the center of the table. It will be beautiful and won't take up much space.
- What are you saying, Mom! There won't be room for many presents under a small tree.
Adult jokes for the New Year
Once I sent a parcel to my friends for the New Year. I put churchkhela and tangerines in it. In response I received a letter: “Vadik, thank you for the gift! The tangerines are delicious, but the candles don’t burn.”
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New Year's Eve is a dinner that smoothly turns into breakfast.
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– Last New Year I didn’t eat Olivier. This New Year I’ll try not to eat herring under a fur coat. I need to figure out why I feel so bad the next day.
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Tanya did not appear online for 3 days. The smartphone could not recognize her face after the New Year celebration.
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-Dear Santa Claus, I asked you for a pink Mercedes last New Year, but my wish never came true! – Angelina Jolie.
- Dear Angelina Jolie, thank me that I did not fulfill the wish of Ruslan from Dagestan! - Father Frost.
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“Where are you going to find so many good men?” Santa Claus was indignant, putting vibrators in gift boxes.
New Year's jokes for corporate parties
What is the difference between a snowman and a snow woman? - You need to carefully consider where his carrot is.
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– My mother-in-law and New Year are very similar.
- How can a person be like a holiday?
– They don’t care whether you’re waiting for them or not, they’ll come anyway.
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New Year 2025 is coming! New corporate stars will appear. Finally, everyone will forget about last year's heroes...
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If after celebrating the New Year there are unresolved issues and vodka on the tables, it means there are problems with communication in the team.
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When going to a New Year's corporate party, remember: you still have to work with these people!
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